now i finally understand beacuse i am tired too.i am sick of everything:reponsibilities,etc.. i am really tired.all these troubles, i asked for it, din't i? my shoulders are tired.i don't want to carry on anymore. can i just let go of these responsibilities for once?am i willing to let go of all these things that i've been holding on tightly, refusing to let go?why even when knowing that it's a trap, i am still willing to be the prey?why? cuz i asked for it.higher you climb, lonelier you feel. thought i've gained something. something to be proud of, something i should be proud of.but in the end, what happened? what happen to those false hopes and dreams that i gave to myself? broken? shattered? and what else did i gain in the end?loneliness.everyone thinks that it's easy but they are wrong.try for a day, a month or even a year and you will know what i mean.why does it always have to be me? i am not afraid to tell the world that i am afraid to shoulder this responsibility.things go wrong, it has to be me again.i don't want to be accused.i am really afraid."it's simple." that's what they say.but different people have different tolerence level.and i am not as strong as i seem.i want to tell someone but who can i tell. it's either people around me who cannot be trusted at all, people who are just as troubled as me,even more tired or people who i really do not wish to bother with my unhappiness and troubles.i have no rights to make people unhappy just because i am unhappy right.. i only know that i have left a great mess for myself.since it's a mess i've created, i should clear it up.easier said than done but eventually i still have to face it. maybe alone.

=how should i be brave?=
onestepcloserscribbled@9:42 AM